You Can’t Break Bread With Everyone In Business

I’ve come across several people who have indicated to me that they prefer to do business over lunch.  This is, in my opinion, so common in the marketplace for people to conveniently say  “let’s do lunch.” Why? I know I have your attention now if you are reading this.  Well, let me preference the context in which I’m referring.

Scenario #1: If you are trying to earn a business relationship with a new prospect and they have agreed to meet with you to hear about your service offerings, you should not meet them over lunch for the first meeting.

Why? The purpose and objective of the first meeting is to get to know the person.  They are scoping you out and so are you.  This gives you the opportunity to learn about their roles and responsibilities within the company.  This gives you time to understand how they evaluate what’s important to them personally, organizationally and financially.  This is the time to find out how they chose their current provider.  This is your opportunity to determine if this is the type of company that you want to work with and if they want to work with you.

Scenario #2: You are scheduled to meet with a prospect for the second time after the initial meeting.  This is the appropriate time to “break bread.”  At this meeting, you are talking very little about business and more about their interests.  These interests could be family, hobbies, personal goals as well as community service initiatives.

Why?  Can you imagine having lunch with someone in which you don’t have anything in common with?  You see, if you meet someone for lunch for the first meeting and you try to talk about personal interests, don’t you think that would be a little intrusive.  Even in a business setting, you still need an exit plan if the prospect is not a good fit for you and you aren’t a good fit for them.

I know this is going to perk some eyebrows but just think about it.  When you are having lunch you are compelled to entertain some personal questions which could invade into someone else’s personal space.  How can you possibly ask or answer personal questions of those you really don’t know.

Having lunch with someone gives both parties the opportunity to relax and build upon common interests without the threat of feeling like you are being interviewed, judged or evaluated.  That’s why it’s important to take the relationship building process slow.  Having lunch is just another touch point of communication. You still need five more. (That’s another topic).

I challenge you to have your first meeting over coffee at best, their office or your office.  Make sure you use this time to qualify your prospects.  If everything makes sense, then move forward on scheduling the second meeting.  And guess what?  The best time to schedule the second meeting is when you are right there in front of one another.  Don’t delay progress by playing email tag.  Pull out your blackberry, iPhone, or whatever latest piece of technology you have to communicate and get a date on the calendar.  The perfect sign to determine if there is a connection is if you both agree to meet again.

Happy Relationship Selling!

 Yvette Alexander Slate, Founder and Principal Member of Carried The Bag, LLC.  Carried The Bag, LLC is a personal and professional development company specifically designed to help individuals and organizations on sales effectiveness, sales strategies and sharpened presentation skills that build relationships and generate revenue.

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